When Job’s three friends, Eliphaz the Temanite, Bildad the Shuhite and Zophar the Naamathite, heard about all the troubles that had come upon him, they set out from their homes and met together by agreement to go and sympathize with him and comfort him. When they saw him from a distance, they could hardly recognize him; they began to weep aloud, and they tore their robes and sprinkled dust on their heads. Then they sat on the ground with him for seven days and seven nights. No one said a word to him, because they saw how great his suffering was. Job 2:11-13 (emphasis added)
Job’s friends are generally panned and get bad reviews for their attempts to help Job with their words. Even God says to Eliphaz, “I am angry with you and your two friends, because you have not spoken the truth about me, as my servant Job has.” Job 42:7 But, one thing I think they should be commended for is that they came and sat in the ashes with Job for seven days.
I recently finished reading through Job, and it reminded me of a time, twenty years ago, when our daughter was born. In those first days, there was some concern about her health and condition. She was born about 6 weeks early, and they did lots of blood draws from her foot and ran lots of tests. Then based on one of those tests, we were directed to different hospital, so a “nuclear test” could be done. I wasn’t sure what “nuclear test” was, but it did not sound good. It turned out that her body would not produce the necessary levels of thyroid, and that she would need to supplement that with a pill each day. In hindsight, it turned out okay, but as a new parent, it was pretty scary for a couple of weeks. With the passage of time, the memories of that fear have pretty much disappeared.
At one point, at the depth of those fears, I e-mailed a couple of people at work who I respected and considered friends. I asked them to pray about the situation. I didn’t know what to do, so I asked friends for prayer. Within a very short time after hitting “send” on that e-mail, one of my friends, Tom came from a different building a couple of blocks away and just sat down in my office. Honestly, I don’t remember anything he said, he just kind of sat there, and listened to me talk about the situation. We didn’t pray, I remember talking to him, and him sitting there – just to be there. Tom and I worked together, and I consider him one of the best work friends I have ever had, but we never really talked about religion or faith. But that day, Tom demonstrated one of the most Christian things I have experienced. He simply sat there, and ministered to me with his presence.
Shortly after reading the book of Job, I saw this short post on Facebook about Winne the Pooh, Piglet, and Eeyore.
It occurred to Pooh and Piglet that they hadn’t heard from Eeyore for several days, so they put on their hats and coats and trotted across the Hundred Acre Wood to Eeyore’s stick house. Inside the house was Eeyore.
“Hello Eeyore,” said Pooh.
“Hello Pooh. Hello Piglet,” said Eeyore, in a Glum Sounding Voice.
“We just thought we’d check in on you,” said Piglet, “because we hadn’t heard from you, and so we wanted to know if you were okay.”
Eeyore was silent for a moment. “Am I okay?” he asked, eventually. “Well, I don’t know, to be honest. Are any of us really okay? That’s what I ask myself. All I can tell you, Pooh and Piglet, is that right now I feel really rather Sad, and Alone, and Not Much Fun To Be Around At All. Which is why I haven’t bothered you. Because you wouldn’t want to waste your time hanging out with someone who is Sad, and Alone, and Not Much Fun To Be Around At All, would you now.”
Pooh looked and Piglet, and Piglet looked at Pooh, and they both sat down, one on either side of Eeyore in his stick house.
Eeyore looked at them in surprise. “What are you doing?”
“We’re sitting here with you,” said Pooh, “because we are your friends. And true friends don’t care if someone is feeling Sad, or Alone, or Not Much Fun To Be Around At All. True friends are there for you anyway. And so here we are.”
“Oh,” said Eeyore. “Oh.” And the three of them sat there in silence, and while Pooh and Piglet said nothing at all; somehow, almost imperceptibly, Eeyore started to feel a very tiny little bit better.
Because Pooh and Piglet were There. No more; no less.
A.A. Milne
E.H. Shepard
Mark Buchanan writes, “The very core of Christian faith is incarnation–God’s coming among us as one of us to walk with us. Incarnation is Christianity’s flesh and blood. And every part of Christian faith seeks embodiment, a way of being lived out here, now, in person.”1
I am thankful for Tom and his presence that day and all the other people who have sat in the dust with me over the years. Maybe it is an act of incarnation to simply sit quietly in the dust with those who are hurting.
- God Walk Moving at the Speed of Your Soul, Mark Buchanan, 2020 P. 6 ↩︎
A Long Intentional Walk 